After moving in my stuff and settling down to classes, I must post something witty and disparaging. Now that I have the exorbitant privilege of a refrigerator and no mandated meal plan, this means no more awkward wasted time at the dining hall and 1 hour plus food binges. Speaking of awkward, I managed to get 2 photos with our great President Joseph Aoun:
Con$idering that I am looking for co-op and have several new commitments this semester, I had to engineer a new diet and schedule worthy of the Mayans and their calendar.
The Joy of Rice
Sweet, white grains of jasmine rice! A rice cooker is a godsend to college students and can even be your only cooking utility, although I also bought a combo pan-pot thing from Amazon just in case.
When the rice begins to form and solidify, you can throw in your meat or "sides" as said in Cantonese to steam-pressure cook. This can include, for example, sausages and Chinese sausages. Best of all, you can save valuable time and eat pre-cooked rice! A miracle!
So far, I have infallibly eaten rice at every meal with a side, which makes me feel less tired than eating bread for some reason. You can even pair it with a two-serving Boloco bowl. I thought I reached new lows when I ate Boloco rice with rice, but talk about economical!
Saying that the meal plan is not highway robbery is like saying fast food doesn't cause obesity.
I wonder if I will eat so much canned tuna, get mercury poisoning, and become a thermometer.
Incredibly Funny Professors
I had the amazing luck of getting a gaggle of funny professors this semester. Being tired increases the delirium and makes their jokes 2x funnier, and when I want to sleep in class (don't judge me, I study a lot outside of class anyways), I somehow start cracking up at their incredibly cheesy jokes.
For example, my mid-level accounting professor asked on the first day to ease the tension (but ended up creating more), "How do accountants get paid?" Student: "By providing a service." Professor: "Yes, that's right, just like a doctor. He tells you to pull down your pants, sticks a shot up your butt, and gets paid." (NO JOKE)
Now, my management information systems teacher is a true comedian, and the Boston accent helps. When he was concerned that the unusual two-tiered class schedule would mess with his SoulCycling class, he said, "I want to weigh as much as I did when I first started: 8 pounds, 9 ounces."
If my mouth could send text messages and emojis, LOL chat bubbles and Pusheens would be flooding out.
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2/2
Con$idering that I am looking for co-op and have several new commitments this semester, I had to engineer a new diet and schedule worthy of the Mayans and their calendar.
The Joy of Rice
Sweet, white grains of jasmine rice! A rice cooker is a godsend to college students and can even be your only cooking utility, although I also bought a combo pan-pot thing from Amazon just in case.
When the rice begins to form and solidify, you can throw in your meat or "sides" as said in Cantonese to steam-pressure cook. This can include, for example, sausages and Chinese sausages. Best of all, you can save valuable time and eat pre-cooked rice! A miracle!
The ceremonial first rice of the semester. I am proud to eat this nutritious staple of my ancestors eaten even in the Qin dynasty.
My school convenience food pyramid
So far, I have infallibly eaten rice at every meal with a side, which makes me feel less tired than eating bread for some reason. You can even pair it with a two-serving Boloco bowl. I thought I reached new lows when I ate Boloco rice with rice, but talk about economical!
Let's do some sophisticated, high-level accounting. $1620/110 = $14.73 per meal swipe. Boloco bowl = $9.82. NO THANK YOU MEAL PLAN
Ready for the next nuclear attack
How about some tuna tartare? IS CANNED TUNA
I wonder if I will eat so much canned tuna, get mercury poisoning, and become a thermometer.
Incredibly Funny Professors
I had the amazing luck of getting a gaggle of funny professors this semester. Being tired increases the delirium and makes their jokes 2x funnier, and when I want to sleep in class (don't judge me, I study a lot outside of class anyways), I somehow start cracking up at their incredibly cheesy jokes.
For example, my mid-level accounting professor asked on the first day to ease the tension (but ended up creating more), "How do accountants get paid?" Student: "By providing a service." Professor: "Yes, that's right, just like a doctor. He tells you to pull down your pants, sticks a shot up your butt, and gets paid." (NO JOKE)
Now, my management information systems teacher is a true comedian, and the Boston accent helps. When he was concerned that the unusual two-tiered class schedule would mess with his SoulCycling class, he said, "I want to weigh as much as I did when I first started: 8 pounds, 9 ounces."
If my mouth could send text messages and emojis, LOL chat bubbles and Pusheens would be flooding out.
